How to let go of someone you still love and move forward

How to let go of someone you still love and move forward

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The breakup is never easy, especially when the great love of our life is at stake.

Perhaps one of the most difficult questions we have to ask ourselves in such moments is when and how to let go of this relationship in order to allow the beginning of our own new life.

Because if we cling to something that is clearly over, we get stuck in an endlessly painful and unproductive phase.

Of course, it is understandable if we don't want to let go of the love of our life. After all, we may have been waiting for them our whole life and felt complete with them. But whether this is really the case or whether it's just how we feel in the given moment, time will tell.

Even after a very painful breakup, the wound on our soul can hurt for years, but as we often say, time heals all wounds.



When the breakup experience is still fresh


The first step we need to take is towards self-understanding and honesty! We must acknowledge that our relationship is not working and that our life is taking a new direction, albeit reluctantly.

After that, it is important to process our feelings about the breakup and the loss, and try to understand what truly matters to us and what doesn't.

Many experience this as a form of grief, and they are not far from reality.

Loss, irreversible separation triggers a "grieving process" within us, and as strange or cold as it may sound, this is exactly what we need at such times. Our body and soul know how to navigate through this difficult situation, and grieving is the most effective way to do so. Along the way, we have to confront a multitude of emotional roller coasters, but each minute brings us closer to letting go and emotional closure.



Avoid self-blame!


Those going through a breakup are prone to falling into the trap of highly burdensome negative emotions. Don't do it! For example, if you made a mistake and harmed the love of your life in your own relationship, it may have been a faulty decision from your current perspective, but from the future perspective, even our most painful experiences can be specifically forward-looking, necessary, and ultimately positive.



The farewell: Look into the future, not the past! 


After processing and understanding our feelings, the time comes for farewell. The best way to do this is to confront it with the realization that although our relationship has ended, there are beautiful and valuable things waiting for us in every aspect of life.

It is important to go through this process wholeheartedly and with openness, so that eventually our life can take a better and happier direction.

Focus on the idea that "when one door closes, another one opens." In a few weeks, you will look back at the painfully dark days and laugh, gaining certainty that indeed, doors are opening before you one after another.

Letting go of the great love of our life is never easy, but when the time comes, we have to do it. We can only move forward and start a new life if we embrace new opportunities and challenges. Perhaps the most beautiful things in our life are yet to come, and in the coming days and years, we can discover many new possibilities, new relationships, and new experiences.



Photo:  © Fotolia / Peopleimages

Editor, 25.05.2023