3 | 3235 views
The idea of remarrying again after 50 might be a scary idea to many of us. Having learned some of life’s lessons, you probably bring some wisdom to the exchange of personal and emotional property. Love may be blind, but in a second marriage, clarity of vision is yet another powerful asset. There are some important aspects to consider before you agree to wed once more.
So, You’re Single Again – Now What?
It is helpful to consider the situations as they have occurred in your life to cause you to be single again. Divorce certainly stirs up a hornet’s nest of aggravations. The loss of a loved one, amicably or not, removes your closest ally from your source of support.It is, even more, confronting when the loss is due to death. Grief needs some time to avoid it becoming the third wheel. However, living alone with your grief indefinitely gives it no other place to go. Consider you have the right to enjoy your life, and you want to bring your best self to the party.After taking the time, sometimes a year or a few, consider dating. If you feel your current social field does not provide the pool of people you would care to consider as marriage material, then get out and do what you love.Activities, classes, groups or even new environments can put you where you meet new people and have a chance to present yourself anew to the world. There is a reason why people tend to connect with people in their immediate environment: It is because they are simply there.There is the all too familiar expression of bringing bad baggage to the relationship, but there can be good baggage, too. Older people, or people with experience, have a lot to offer. Love is wonderful when it is new and exciting but learning how to love for the long haul takes some time.
You Must Not Avoid Facing the Financial Situation
Often, a woman finds she was not in charge of the finances in the previous marriage making her feel vulnerable. Regardless of the circumstances, there is always room for professional advice whether that comes from an accountant, a financial planner or fiduciary, or a lawyer who is practiced in the financial aspects of marriage. You may also find help from community centers or churches that offer basic financial awareness services.Seeking professional guidance on finances when remarrying should be paramount. You are heading for retirement. Ignoring the finances or simply trusting that everything will be alright is unwise.While it is never too late to get started thinking about your finances as you get older, you must be clear on the financial issues before getting married again after at an older age Don’t feel bad, though, as a large swath of retirement age people are woefully unprepared for retirement.Each of you may have savings or assets that you bring to the marriage. You may want to maintain your own bank account while establishing a new joint account. Remember, including your children in your financial dealings may also set you up for being subject to their creditors as well. Talk with a financial planner to be sure you are not facing any pitfalls in the future.
The Cascade of Legal Arrangements that Must Be Signed
The advice from an attorney should be held in good stead when it comes to a sequential marriage. Perhaps with your assets, it is time to take a prenup seriously. An estate planner may be useful in getting all those financial ducks lined up for your protection. There may be premarital debt to take into consideration. Remember, your new partner’s financial picture is going to have an effect on yours regardless of the condition.There may be children and grandchildren on both sides of your respective previous marriages. An estate planner can help you sort out what to do with savings, IRAs, 401Ks, property, and any other assets. Wills and trusts may be considered.Whatever you decide, it should be discussed openly and honestly with all agreements put in writing and signed. If your potential partner is upset or closed off to the idea of either talking about finances or getting help with arranging them to your liking, turn around and run the other way. You should not feel apprehensive about having a background check performed.Getting married again at an older age gives you so many more advantages than what it must have been like in the first run. You are wiser, more experienced, and you are not as susceptible to the emotional games that teach us what red flags to watch out for. By your declaring yourself in how you behave and express yourself, you draw like-individuals to you. If that is not apparent in your current environment, by all means, branch out. It is a big world out there and you are bound to find someone who is simpatico, now that you know what you are looking for.
Photo: © Rawpixel.com /stock.adobe.com