You are strong, perceptive, and radiant. Anyone reading your post should be able to see that. If men can't see past your circumstances and what you have lived through, they are not the right men. However, I do believe there is someone who would deserve and appreciate you that you have a meaningful connection with. In the meantime, you inspire me to try to be strong on my own and love myself a little more. I've been struggling with that. As my son keeps telling me, mom, the plane of your life is crashing. You need to put on your oxygen mask and strap in." In other words, stop responding to my situation and start practicing self care. It is hard, but I am trying.
You sound like a wonderful, proud mamma, and your kids sound amazing. Not surprising since you sound amazing too. You sound like you lead a balanced life, simple, not what you imagined, but for now something. None of us come with any lifetime guarantees. What you bring to the table is wit, wisdom, a life richly lived, the will to live fully, no matter what your circumstances, empathy, and a balanced spirit with true healing energy. Oh, and a beautiful smile too! You need someone who can see all of that.